The tree, the stone and your description of the day are all beautiful. I hope that Silas's tree grows big and strong. I'm so sorry that you & Lani do not have your son to wrap your arms around.
Sally - Ah "New Slang", that song has made me cry since I lost my daughter. The line "New slang when you notice the stripes, the dirt in your fries. Hope it's right when you die, old and bony" makes me so sad. For Hope, for you, for Simon, for me, for my husband, of my little tiny girl, for all of us. I wish that we had only noticed the dirt when we were old and bony. I'm glad that the sun came out and that the birds sang for your Hope.
We had a short funeral service conducted by the hospital chaplain who had baptised our daughter a few days before. It gave me comfort that she was buried by one of the few people who met her when she was alive. I have only the vestiges of religious faith and my husband none at all (as far as I am aware) but we had the words from the Book of Common Prayer for the death of a child," . . .receive, we pray your child G in your never-failing care and love, comfort all who have loved her on earth . .." The funeral was very small, only the chaplain, my husband and myself. No music, no flowers, no mourners but her parents. We sat with her coffin between us. I can't articulate how I changed that day but I am a changed person. I don't know if I am changed for better or worse as yet.