Author: 
Kate Inglis
ID: 
001a
Keywords: 
faith, God
Religious Affiliation: 
non-religious
Type of Loss: 
neonatal death at six weeks due to brain damage in delivery and prematurity
Codes (Bakker): 
Age at time of post: 
mid 30s
Living children at time of post?: 
yes
Time Since Loss: 
1 year, 5 months (May 2007)
Months since loss (at time of post): 
17
Gender: 
F
Images in Post: 
NA
Date of Post: 
10/2/2008
Date of Access: 
6/12/2012
Number of Comments: 
NA
URL of post: 
http://www.glowinthewoods.com/home/2008/10/2/in-the-absence-of-miracles.html#comments
Author blog title: 
Sweet Salty
Author blog URL: 
http://www.sweetsalty.com/

I think we all have this struggle, regardless of whether we'd say it's with God or not. Faith - including but not limited to the big-f FAITH in the church way - is just about the last thing to rebound after the loss of a baby, I think.

Small-f faith - the general feeling that things are going to be okay - is so elusive. I'm still desperately seeking that... or at least a certain level of comfort with not knowing if anything will turn out the way we wish. Being able to shove doubt aside and be content despite having seen the swallowing void that may or may not await -- that must be one of many possible definitions of peace.

Codes (Paris): 
Comments (Paris): 

an expectation that things will go well -- this is unmet.  Have to live with uncertainty.  Faith does not eliminate uncertainty or guarantee against future loss.