We are now, finally, after much deliberation and discussion, seeing a therapist. nothing spiritual. All practical. I'm not looking for philosophical reasons - looking for ways to make me not want to punch people in the face. All the time. Even when I'm smiling on the outside. I think she is definitely a good thing for us right now. Don't know for how long, but right now, yes. It is working.
Luckily, my spiritual crisis happened long before the loss of our daughters. But I am a little sad that their death caused some spiritual shaking for others that we are very close to. There are many, many times that I wished I had the comfort of a church or shared belief to usher me through grief, but I won't let serious issues with my former religion slide, not even if I crave the scent of incense and the release of singing hymns off tune.
I too have heard the maybe the short life was all the life they needed. Sometimes I like to believe that. Sometimes.
negative example of code 4; longing for religious comfort but finding none; sad that death of baby caused crisis of faith in others