Sophia - I love your message on why you shaved your head. Kind of like grabbing the grief by the balls and saying, 'let's do this - bring it on'. I wish I was that gutsy.
Thanks Angie for the post - I do think rituals are so important. One of the things that helped us the most was that we had some rituals to hang onto, and that we were willing to make up some credible ones for ourselves. My partner and her family are muslim, so we marked the 40 days after Z's birth/death with a memorial service, after having a very small family-only funeral at the hospital. For me, this was the right moment to let our wider family and friends in to share our grief. We also made the memorial into the naming and godparent-designating ceremony we had planned to have if she'd lived, except that we chose godparents from loved ones who we'd lost in the previous few years - so that they could take care of her on the other side.
Friends of ours named a star for Z - that has become a huge comfort & ritual. Even though we've never had the astronomical expertise to find her exact constellation, whenever I see the first star of the evening, I take that time to talk to her.
found comfort in religious rituals involving friends and family