A friend (an ex-friend?) wrote to me in the winter of 2008 about how she was trying to forgive me for not writing and talking to her more. I wrote back, explaining that I wasn't not communicating with her because I was mad at her (after several years of not communicating at all, I hadn't thought much about her at all) but because my baby had died. I was nice about it even though I didn't want to be.
She sent me almost an identical message - "Why don't you talk to me anymore?" - a couple months ago. And what I wanted to write back was this:
"I don't write to you because you don't approach me thoughtfully, because when you write to me about friends whose baby died and 'who learned to accept God's plan,' the wink and the nudge are so damned obvious that I want to reach through the computer, grab you by the throat, and tell you in detail what I think of God's plan *while I throttle you.* I've found your faith particularly shallow ever since college, but even if I didn't, my grief isn't the property of your faith and if you can't get that, please leave me alone. Forever."
/delete
Instead, I, um, "like" cute photos of her kids on face.book in an effort to fend her off.