I'm sorry about your Gabbie, and you're right, it is sickening to think about...I wish none of us had to do this! My Grace was born at 21 weeks and she was alive for a short while...while we were holding her, we had to watch her struggle to breathe becuase her little lungs weren't developed enough and we and the doctors were helpless to do anything. In my nightmares, I imagine that it felt like piercing pain to her tiny, frail body and it makes my heart ache...
On my good days I try to hope that God/whatever higher power/the universe would not be so cruel as to cause our sweet babies pain and that their little spirits just floated to heaven or the universe or whatever happens (can you tell I'm struggling with this to?) It's all just so unfair. What I do know for certain is that we all would have done ANYTHING to make things different for our babies and that we did not choose any of this. I hope that our babies somehow know that. Wishing you as much peace as you can have.
wondering about afterlife