I read "Empty Cradle" about a fortnight after Emma died. I can't remember exactly but something in that book triggered the idea that after losing a child, I might end up losing my husband too. Like others here, it was a case of saying "No. I've lost too much already. I'm not giving up on my marriage without a fight." And my husband felt the same. In those early months, we were so close. We celebrated our tenth anniversary about five months out and I described us then as clinging to each other. We had bereavement counselling together. It wasn't marriage guidance but it still helped.
It hasn't (and still isn't, in the newborn stages with our subsequent child) been easy. Two tensions for us are faith and family. We are Christians. I'm no longer sure what I believe. My husband has held fast to our beliefs. Suddenly that is a gulf between us whereas before religion was a support and a lifeline to us both. We both come from close knit families. My husband's sister gave birth to a living girl five weeks before I gave birth to our stillborn daughter. It hurts him that I feel very distanced now from his family and try to avoid contact as much as is politely possible.
From that perspective, the statistics don't surprise me because the two things that might have the potential to be "deal breakers" now will still have that potential in nine years time.
That said, we love each other and I can't imagine ever NOT being with him. I truly hope that that is enough to keep us strong.
tension with spouse because of differeng faith reactions (one "lost" faith while the other did not)