Thank you for that verse, as I sit here at work nearly in tears. Beautiful. "A crown of beauty instead of ashes" What a gift.
My story is much the same. Knowing at 20 weeks that aside from a miracle, my son would not live. It was suggested to me that I abort too. In the end, as my son started to slip away still in me, I opted for an Emergency CSection. And even though he didn't have a chance, I never regretted that decision. I did everything I could and gave God every chance.
I think that's why I am still once in a while angry (it's been nearly 5 years) because I feel like I did every single thing I could in hopes that God would do what I KNEW he could do if he chose.
I do not understand why some people receive a miracle and why I didn't. But I still believe in His sovereignty. I am awed by Him and I am sometimes angry with Him. But I am unable to not believe.
Thank you for your beautiful post and your perspective. And I wish like anything I'd have had the presence of mind to have a camera available for beautiful pictures of William, the way you did. It just all happened so quickly.