Altered relationship with community of faith
Gal, this was so stunning. The passages that resonated with you resonate with me, too. They make that occasional yearning for a spiritual home crop up again. I'm not religious in the typical sense of the word, for so many of the reasons you mention here - in too many ways, the bible and church and the people who presume to employ them just don't ring as truth for me.
I don't know what I am, exactly - not an atheist, but not too comfortable with conventional ideas and mythology around religion. I'd feel out of sorts if someone suggested Liam was in a place called 'heaven', or that his injuries and death were at the expense of some being's 'plan'. I feel like those are easy, pick-and-choose sentiments that allow the speaker to wash his or her hands, to feel like they've neatly said what they think they're supposed to say. It doesn't rub me the wrong way, necessarily - it just feels foreign, as you said - like clothes that don't fit.